i lost a very dear friend and it is making me crazy. one second i am doing that scream cry, sobbing uncontrollably, then a split second later, full calmness.
i feel like kicking and screaming and punching and biting.
three days now in a strange sobbing paralysis.
fuck.
there are many folks that i am supposed to get a hold of that are just going to have to wait.
tonite, i drink myself silly.
tomorrow, i puke for hours, hopefully.
i will be fine by next friday.
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